The spider who lives in my shower

The spider who lives in my shower
Wakes every morning at dawn.
She walks up and down walls
With no trouble at all,
And spins spidery dreams all day long.

The spider who lives in my shower
Likes to go out to the bar.
We laugh and we joke,
We drink and we smoke.
And when we’re at home, there we are.

The spider who lives in my shower
Could out-talk the moon on a bet.
She dances all night;
Gives the girls quite a fright.
Then a shower, some bugs, and she’s set.

The spider who lives in my shower
Has spectacles perched on her nose
At least – I suppose –
One never quite knows –
I’ve never been up quite that close.

The spider who lives in my shower
Has a habit of eating in bed.
“Take a few tasty mites –
Rolled up nice with some spice;
They squirt when you chew ‘em,” she said.

The spider who lives in my shower
Paints her toenails with polish and flair.
She likes to be read
To when going to bed
And to wiggle her legs in the air.